Wednesday, March 2, 2016

Countdown to the End: Day 23

Today the bus left at 6:45am out of the high school parking lot with 20 students. Today was day 2 of State FFA Leadership Conference. We went up on stage and won a few plaques and awards. I spent 12 hours with students and I had such mixed emotions throughout the day. By lunch time I was so glad that I wasn’t coming back to teaching. Students were acting immature, and they really couldn’t handle it. I was the badass mother by noon today.

South Tama received these
 plaques and awards. 
After lunch when we won the awards and students went up on stage, I had a sophomore student ask me how he could get up on stage to win an award. This broke my heart because I couldn’t tell him how. I didn’t know how because I wasn’t going to be his teacher anymore. If more students asked that question and they followed my instructions to meet that goal, I would think twice about leaving. Every student wants to be up on stage at state, but very few are willing to work for it. I know what it takes to win, but if they aren’t dedicated enough to work at it I can’t get them up on stage.

At the last session I gave my students instructions of where to meet up after they walked across the stage. My student said he wanted to stay, and I said that could be arranged. I was kidding around, and he said “you just need to enjoy this…..it’s your last one.” This was all through a text message, so he didn’t see the devastated look on my face. I’m always rushing around getting students where they need to be and doing head counts that I forgot that this is my last session ever. I tried to do what he said. I really tried to enjoy it. I stopped poking students to stay awake, or to put their feet down, or to put their phones away, or to stop rudely yawning loudly, or to stop wearing a Birthday Buffalo paper hat. I sat back and listened to the speaker. The one story that really stuck with me was that he compared life to cheating on a test. Obviously, since I’m a teacher hearing the words cheating on a test got my attention. He told the story of how he made up a test when his teacher was teaching another class. The different class was also taking a test that day, and another classmate cheated off of his test. Since it wasn’t his class it was a different test. He compared that to life. He explained that we all aren’t taking the same tests, but we try to take the same tests in life and “cheat” off of each other. We all have different strengths and weaknesses that make us ideal for certain vocations, but yet we try to fit into the same mold.

I know I made the right decision because I will raise my own children and not someone else's.


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